Feeling: balanced
Listening to: 80s nostalgia
Reading/Watching: Real Genius

It's strange to think about what my life was about just one or two years ago. Expand it to three or four years, and the contrast starts to get ridiculous.

But now, people ask me how I'm doing, and it's shockingly easy to say I'm marvelous, I'm fantastic, I'm giddy, I'm joyous.

I have a home that's mine, unless I choose to share it with someone else (and I currently do, even though Will makes a career of leaving dirty clothing in the wrong place). I have a job that pays well, uses my degree, challenges me, fulfills my need for accomplishment and camaraderie, and makes me laugh a few times a day. I have two dogs that are expensive, crazy, and pains in the ass, but they're also adorable and energetic and hilarious. I have a family that's there when I need them, and doesn't pry when I don't call on a daily (or weekly) basis.

And I'm loved. Will loves me. That's the most surprising part. That's the piece of the puzzle I wouldn't have predicted. That's the part that's still sometimes maddening, because people aren't predictable. Even now, I go back and read the old entries from first meeting him and say, "Who knew?!" Certainly not me, the Obtuse Queen of Tunnelvision.

The best part is, I know better than to get all mopey and focus on what's still not perfect, like how very messy my house gets with two people and two dogs living here, or how very frightened I am about screwing up my lovely new job, or my gorgeous mountain of credit card debt that will take me about a year of very careful living to put right again. My clothes don't fit, because the pill I'm on throws me out of whack and I've gained ten pounds (okay, maybe it's fifteen). Andante needs knee surgery, and I need to save up for it. I still haven't gotten more than halfway through my graduate degree. There are serious issues to worry over, but I'm choosing not to.

Some things go up, others come down. The good part is that the balance is still in the plus column.

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