Feeling: Sleepy... at exactly the wrong time.
Listening to: You know, someone should make a rhythm section out of keyboard clicks... then again, maybe not.
Reading/Watching: He needs a nickname... let's call him Dom.

Do you ever reach the end of the day and feel like it�s not quite done?

Do you spend your day in the usual manner (maybe a little more low-key than average), and then come to the end of the day and feel this sort of leftover tension, an awareness, a waiting for something to happen that never did?

It�s as if yesterday was scripted for action, for drama. As if I stored up tears and courage and laughter and adrenaline against what the day might bring, and it never came. So I was left with it: the last layer of milk on the bottom of the glass, too much to throw out, but not enough to put away for later.

It was like watching a movie and leaving for the bathroom, only to come back and catch the tail end of a tempestuous scene, and know you should have been part of it. I hadn�t done enough yesterday. There was a surplus that needed to be let go.

Jules calls me a high-energy person; she�s probably right. I felt like I�d gassed up for a long trip and only gone three-fourths of the way. And I couldn�t go to sleep with that excess energy welling up- I needed to dance, or laugh, or cry, or something.

I reluctantly signed offline because I knew I needed sleep. I�ve been a zombie during the midday slump at work these past few days. Then I got home and lay down, and became Katie the Human Eggbeater. I whipped those sheets into a frenzy, trying to find the one way I could arrange myself and make my mind and muscles just stop long enough to let me dream.

It took an hour of stubbornness before I gave in and got back up around 11:45. I�m not really a phone person, but when Instant Messenger is no longer available, I reach out and start dialing. I called Drew, who humored me for maybe thirty minutes before saying he needed to go, and then I tormented a guy I�ve not talked to much since we were in Cherry Orchard together ("Dom").

I think it might be the first time we�ve really talked as opposed to just chattering. We�ll have to do it again sometime. At first he teased me about calling him just because I needed to get sleepy. Two hours later, yes, I was sleepy. But mostly I think I needed to connect with someone I can see, can touch.

I love my online friends. I do. But they feel so far away sometimes. I knew if I needed to, I could hop in my car and actually talk to this guy face to face. There�s something comforting in that.

And without going through any serious emotional mood swings, I managed to siphon off the expectant feeling, soften the jangling edges and stop being poised for some sort of disaster. I slept.

We won�t talk about how *happy* I was to wake up again at 6:30.

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