Feeling: wakeful
Listening to: silence. it's not helping.
Reading/Watching: anything. everything.

I have no idea why I am still up. My mind is racing.

I want to call Drew and bug him. Except I've stretched the liberties of friendly irritation a bit too far with him sometimes, so I should bump him to the bottom of the list. He deserves his rest.

I want to call Miller and ask him how his evening went.

I want to call Mini-Me and ask her how her evening went. ::winkwink::

I want to call Dom, except I always seem to call him in the middle of the night and then we talk for hours, which is very bad because we both have school the next day and he holds me fully responsible.

I want to call Nimsay and chatter away, but I am quite positive she is in bed, unable to get to the phone.

I want to call Bri, but part of the reason I am up and buzzy right now is because I just hung up with her and calling back would be counterproductive. Plus she's heard all this before. Five or six times.

I want to call Sam, because we never seem to talk, except to make fun of each other (and do that weird elbow-wrestling thing when we're side by side), but I don't have his number. Plus there's the given: calling past 1 a.m. is considered, in most circles, to be somewhat uncouth.

I want to call Jae, except she is, in her own words, "about to get some and go to sleep." So now is not quite appropriate.

I want to call my sister. God do I want to; she always knows more than I do. But what could she do? She doesn't know any of the people involved.

It is madness. It is madness and yet here I am. I want to expell it out my fingertips, trap it in poems. I want to do something foolish and post a confession right here, right now. I want a shoulder-popping hug, except they're hard to come by at this time of night, unless you find someone with an hourly fee.

I want to do anything to stop thinking about something that I know, with all the self-preservation of my being, that I should not be thinking about. In that direction lies disaster and utter, utter foolishness, because it has happened before. Once, is funny. Twice, is silly. Three times, is Katie.

And no, I will not tell you. If you want to know, ask me for the password to my private entries. Do not be offended if I refuse.

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