Feeling: Miserly
Listening to: Massive Attack - Angel
Reading/Watching: Honorary Dork Sister Bob. Keep those wild oats on a leash, k babe?

I am so happy.

I can't say why, but I am just so happy. Sun shining happy. Dancing happy. Twittering birdies happy. Yes, I really am silly enough to be that thrilled about it, Drew. Forgive me.

On a completely unrelated note, I am such a complete pushover about debts. Not mine... it makes me extremely squirmy, knowing I owe someone something. Especially since I'm apt to forget and my friends will just let it slide, which I hate.

But I'm pretty open-handed. Some would call me an easy mark, actually, since it's gotten me in a bit of trouble before. I am, however, in a position now where I have plenty to go around, and loaning a bit here and a smidge there is no biggie.

But I need to not be such a creampuff about getting it back. As of yesterday, one person owed me twenty-five dollars (given a month ago), another fifteen (two months ago), and a third had taken the videotape I let her borrow and loaned it to someone else without asking me (last fall).

Today, the first friend paid back twenty of the twenty-five, promising the rest as soon as possible. The third finally gave back the video. I count myself lucky. But I really need to learn to have more spine.

Ever notice how the people who loan the easiest are the worst about getting it back? And the people who never ever loan things are extremely uptight about retrieving their precious items. Shouldn't it be the other way around? People who give a lot need to make sure they get it all back. And people who screen everyone so closely before lending a dime should know and trust that those good enough to receive a loan will be good enough to repay it.

Guess it all files under politeness. Sigh. But I still need the rest of the money, much as it really rankles to have to ask for it.

Basically, this system is just wrong. We're all wrong. We all suck.

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