Feeling: Frustrated
Listening to: A Perfect Circle - Judith
Reading/Watching: City by the Sea with Nimsay

You are so exhausting.

Why do I bother with you? I already think about you too much, every word written about you in here is in some way maudlin, and you generally excel at just shattering my peace of mind, no matter what you're doing or not doing. Even long before, back when I had no desire to know you better, back when I instinctively knew that I'd be caught forever, back when I was running in place, you had the ability to bring any emotion out of me that you wanted. It just screams of willing puppetry, the way I am with you.

So why do I bother?

Oh, right, because I can't not. It'd be like leaving a $100 bill in the gutter, just because it's wet and wrinkled. There are so many things that you are that I can't pass by, so many ways that you make me happier (believe it or not). Everyone else is walking on by your gutter because the mud obscures you and makes you look like nothing, like scrap paper, but I know.

I know; why don't you?

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