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I need not to need...
2003-09-12 - 9:14 p.m.

Feeling: quiet
Listening to: Jeff Buckley - Hallelujah
Reading/Watching: Sword-Maker

The one who survives by making the lives of others worthwhile
She's coming apart
Right before my eyes
The one who depends on the services she renders
To those who come knocking
She's seeing too clearly what she can't be
What understanding defies

She says, "I need not to need
or else a love with intuition
Someone who reaches out to my weakness and won't let go
I need not to need
I've always been the tower
But now I feel like I'm the flower
Trying to bloom in snow."

She turns out the light anticipating night
Falling tenderly around her
and watches the dusk
The words won't come
She carries the act so convincingly, the fact is
Sometimes she believes it
That she can be happy the way things are
Be happy with the things she's done

"I need not to need
Or else a love with intuition
Someone who reaches out to my weakness
and won't let go

I need not to need
I've always been the tower
But now I feel like I'm the flower
Trying to bloom in snow."

Reach out
But hold back
Where is safety
Reach out
and hold back
"Where is the one who can change me
Where is the one
The one
The one?"

Reach out
But hold back
Where is safety
Reach out
and hold back
"Where is the one who can save me
Where is the one
The one
The one?"

Vienna Teng, 'The Tower'

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