Feeling: ridiculous
Listening to: parsing a CD mix, so snippets of songs
Reading/Watching: pages on the ancient, nasalized vocal method which allows for forced vibrato as a mode of expression... I'll shut up now.

When I was very young, I took it for granted that everything should be easy, and if it didn't work out on the first try, perhaps it wasn't for me.

That was why swingsets, solo games of Pretend, and lots of singing in the backyard happened. Anything that required hand-eye-coordination just didn't come easily enough.

Then I flipped it backward, and became devoted to pouring every ounce of myself into every project. I think it occurred right around the beginning of every new stage in life. With writing, suddenly it was why I got up in the morning. With college, I was Overprepared Freshman.

But by the time senior year rolled around (the first time), I was a little more relaxed about things like deadlines and so-and-so percentage of your grade, etc. I stayed relaxed for the two years following graduation.

Now, I'm back in school and freaking out about every single detail. It would be a good thing, if I could make it into constructive effort, but instead I find myself wasting time by fixating on insignificant details, like how far to indent my bullets on a handout.

This is ridiculous. I'm trying to research a methodology paper, and just reading the websites I'm pulling up is paralyzing me with fear about whether I can still remember how to write a paper.

Geez.

But on a brighter note, I want everything on this page. Except maybe the hoodies. But still, I wouldn't say no.

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