Feeling: antisocial
Listening to: Stone Sour - Bother
Reading/Watching: Buffy s.3 with Lynne

This made me giggle:

You are the Social Anxiety disorder rock! :(

::Which rock personality disorder (from the Zoloft commercial) should you have? (Results contain pictures!)
brought to you by Quizilla

I used to think I had Social Anxiety Disorder, although in truth I was just very shy and insecure.

No one knew, because when meeting people I'd plaster on a paper-thin smile and pretend to be gregarious and sweet and cute and bouncy while inwardly my stomach tied in knots and I thought, "Oh my God! What if they don't like me? Then I'll have to see them all the time and think, 'That person doesn't like me. Why don't they like me? Did I do something wrong to make them not like me? What can I change to make them like me? I'll bet they're sitting there thinking about how stupid and ugly I am right now and they're probably right...' and if they do like me, then I have to keep being this fake smiley person so that they'll keep liking me and it'll be so exhausting and I want to run away now..."

Then I got to college. And despite my best efforts, some people didn't like me (::coughCharlieBrowncough::). And when I wasn't even trying, some people did like me. The people who did like me convinced me that it was because of who I was, not what I did, and those who didn't like me pissed me off sufficiently to the point where I could say, "Fuck you, you're stupid for not liking me. Now you don't get to have me for a friend. Your loss."

And life got better. All without the help of Zoloft.

But the little blushing pebble guy is still really cute.

Comments? 0 so far...
Not a Diaryland member? Sign the Guestbook.