Feeling: off-balance
Listening to: Damien Rice - I Remember
Reading/Watching: Wedding Crashers

Walked around town yesterday, just talking with my future sister-in-law-in-law (mon coeur's twin brother's fianc�e).

While it's good that we're both making an effort to get along, that we both agree family is important and we don't want to divide the twins, we don't enjoy each other all that much. She's a longtime friend of Bri's, for example, who is going to be one of her bridesmaids. Just that fact makes some portions of our conversation stilted, because through my years of fighting/mending with Bri, she was hearing nothing but Bri's side of complaints and explanations.

It's like walking around a snobby cute guy with your stomach held in. You intend it to be just for a minute, until he goes away, but for some reason he stays. And you just can't quite breathe.

Even so, we tried harder and harder to "bond," because she is aware that we're both here to stay, and our boys are wildly happy whenever they get to spend time together, so we have to learn to get along. That took the form of wandering around Target, then going to see Wedding Crashers (which I liked, but despised myself for liking), and, when the boys were still intent on playing video games together, laughing, and speaking in unison, we went to Taco Cabana and talked for another two hours.

The good part: we can agree on the boys. They are very much alike, and we both love them dearly, so talking about memories and little quibbles with them works. Talking about wedding planning works, because brides are the only ones who will listen to detailed descriptions of centerpieces. And when we trade stories that we've heard the boys tell from their childhood, it makes us both want to cry (although they don't understand why it's sad). She appreciates as well as I do the subtext behind some things.

I figure as long as we're trying out of love, it can't go too terribly wrong. Maybe someday we'll even like each other.

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